Forum Replies Created
-
Posts
-
Good question, Kate! Well, Kristen and I are both FireThrivers, and you know what we do. 😉 But I will say that I think the way that Kristen and I run our business deserves a mention, because we definitely don’t act like full Firestarters. I think a major Firestarter would likely be way more interested in building an empire of sorts. They’d likely be more motivated to delve into marketing strategies and tactics in order to reach the maximum amount of people. We’re just so bored by that! So our growth is more steady, slow, and organic than anything else. And we’re pretty fine with that! We see having a business as one facet of our lives, not our whole lives.
I’ve got a couple FireThriver clients in mind that I can talk about, and I’ll ask Kristen to do the same! And hopefully a few other FireThrivers will jump in, too. 🙂
I have one client who’s in the process of transitioning from a full-time job to starting her own business doing editing for women in online business. But she’s likely going to have a part-time job on the side, so that she doesn’t feel the immense pressure to force her business to make money right away.
And I had another client who recently got a full-time job working in a support role at a local college. But she sees her job as the vehicle that allows her to do what she really wants, which is write a novel.
Oh, and I have another client who just got out of the military, so she’s taking a pause right now and living with her mom for a time. She doesn’t want to go back and get a traditional job, so she’s exploring the idea of doing a couple things — starting her own organization business (i.e. helping people clean out and organize their crap) and building her own tiny house. She’s also interested in the idea of becoming someone who designs tiny houses and sells the plans to people online so they can build their own, too. And for more consistent money, she’s looking into freelance writing jobs on the side.
I think the possibilities are endless! But I think the big theme is: Flexibility and balance are critical, but NOT at the expense of your peace of mind. It’s really important not to sacrifice stability and security, because then it will be hard to actually focus on the REAL work (i.e. running the business, or writing the book, etc.). Most FireThrivers I know really like the idea of work being a vehicle that allows them to make a difference while living their ideal lifestyle. Whereas a Firestarter might happily work 12-hour days sometimes, because they’re so energized by what they do, a FireThriver is likely never going to want to bust their a** in that way. We want to help people and do something meaningful, but if it’s not also allowing us to have time to live our ideal life, then what’s the point?
Hope this helps! 🙂
That’s awesome, Mary! And you’re right. The commute may be easier to swallow when you’re getting paid so much better! Keep us posted about how it goes. 🙂
Congrats on the new job, Mary!! I’m so pumped for you! Is it as much of a 9 or 10 as you hoped it might be before the interview??
And it’s kind of cool that the Halloween party is going to be more personal rather than work-related, because now you have at least one place you can wear your costume! And maybe it’ll all serve as a belated “going away” party for you.
Hey Mary!
It’s really cool to see how good you’ve gotten at identifying what’s a 9 or 10, and what’s not. You went in to that interview and immediately came out knowing what the real ranking was. A lot of people might have tried to keep the rose-colored glasses on! I’m glad you already have another potential 9 lined up! 🙂
I think that start date, like salary, is probably negotiable. Obviously if 10/10 is ideal for them, they’re going to say so in hopes someone will be able to accommodate them. But for you to want to give your current job at least 2 weeks notice is the respectful thing to do, and a future employer shouldn’t be upset for you treating a past employer with that kind of respect. (And if they DO get demanding or testy about that, then that’s a red flag).
It’s also totally OK to be thinking about all the time you put into your halloween costume. If you get hired and they don’t have a party, maybe you can organize something yourself (at work or outside of work) so that you get to show off your creation!
This comment was such a delight to read, Caela! I’m lol-ing (OMG, do the young people even SAY “lol” anymore!? I don’t know because I’m THIRTY now). I’m so glad that I was able to pull off some Inception-level hijinks and help plant seeds from your future self. ????
This is completely spot-on in general, and also a very accurate description of my own Achilles heel: “Comparison is the thief of joy but impatience is her evil, unassuming twin.” UH HUH, YES, FOR SURE. Alan Watts was VERY right. If you can’t be happy now, you can’t really be happy at all. And yet, you’re also allowed to be frustrated and pissed and confused and throw tantrums sometimes. It’s always both/and. So long as you don’t let the frustration and impatience make you miss all the good stuff that’s happening right now–and there IS so much good stuff happening now!
I think SO many of us would love to have realized the things you know now, at your age. You are WAY ahead of the game already. Which isn’t always a comfort in the moment, I know, but from my now 30-year-old perspective, I’m not worried about you AT ALL. I know that, given where you are now, you’re gonna get where you’re going for sure. Who knows exactly when and how (and don’t bother too hard trying to figure it out, because it never unfolds the way we expect anyway!), but you’ve got all the raw materials and plenty more to spare. It’s really just a matter of time, and allowing yourself to have fun and experiment and find small things to get excited about and letting it unfold one step at a time.
Keep us posted, as always! I can’t wait to watch your progress. 🙂
Hey Caela!
To answer your last question first — Yes, I can totally see this being a big focal point of 1-on-1 coaching, and being college-aged doesn’t make you too young. Our youngest client was actually 17 and still in high school! It’s really more about the readiness, which can happen at any age. And you strike me as an old soul who’s wise beyond her years. 🙂
It sounds like you’re in need of a filtering process for your ideas! Coming up with a handful (like 2-5) filter questions to ask yourself any time you’re trying to decide whether or not to pursue an idea is REALLY helpful in giving you perspective and narrowing down whether something is worth your time and energy.
Some ideas might be:
-“How well does this idea align with my Firestarter energy?” AKA, is it something you have creative autonomy over? Is the schedule going to be rigid? Sometimes an idea SEEMS cool, but it doesn’t align very well with our values. Like, for example, I could technically have a physical office for coaching with clients, but I would hate to have a commute and be tied to one physical location. So even though it’d be the same work, the environment wouldn’t be right. Doesn’t align enough with my values.
-“How likely is it that I will still be interested in this in a few weeks/months?” — It’s always useful to be honest with yourself about whether something is a shiny object, or whether it has staying power.
-“How possible is it that this thing could grow or evolve into something else?” — This isn’t to say you can’t commit to something that’s temporary or finite! But if your main goal is to be able to use an idea to leverage something (money, time, connections, experience, etc.) then something that you could see opening you up to even more and greater opportunities might be worth your while.
-“How much time/energy does this require from me? And is giving that amount of time/energy going to burn me out or will I be fine?” — An idea may not be worth it if it’s going to cause you to be resentful of the time you no longer have. Ideally, an idea worth pursuing is one that you stay excited about and engaged in because you aren’t tired of it, or aren’t annoyed that it’s taking away from other things.”
These are just a few examples! You can ponder this for yourself and see, based on your own unique values and preferences, what other types of filter questions might work best for you. Let me know what you think! 🙂
These are such great thoughts Mimi, thank you for sharing with us and Caela! I couldn’t agree more that HSPs suffer more in situations that are wrong for them, but shine more in situations that are right for them. All in all, I’m personally grateful to be a HSP because I wouldn’t want to be someone who easily tolerated the wrong thing! That wouldn’t amount to a good life. And your advice about focusing on the “feeling alive” part is right on! 🙂
Hey Mary! I’m glad that you stuck to your guns and decided not to get feedback about the interview! And I think it’s cool that you found a way to make a compromise, in regard to the training materials, that everyone can be satisfied with. Good thinking!
That’s an awesome quote, Mary, thanks for sharing! I’m glad you trust that you’re not the only one responsible for making your life work out. 🙂
