Reply To: Ask the experts
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Stacey — It makes so much sense that your gremlin is freaking out in moments when you’re “putting yourself out there” (publishing a blog, giving a presentation, etc.). I agree with Rachel that your self-worth feels pretty solid, but the confidence piece gets shaky because of that pesky gremlin.
I really like your question of how to deal with the gremlin in real-time. I definitely recommend doing a gremlin dialogue (see the workbook for examples) immediately before doing anything that feels scary and vulnerable. Your gremlin needs soothing and reassurance before you hit publish or walk out onto the stage so it can stay calm enough to let you move forward with relative confidence.
I don’t want to act like a sporadic gremlin dialogue is a cure-all, though. The truth is that this is a long-term job of practicing responding to that inner fearful voice with compassion, non-judgment, and a bit of tough love (the same as you would respond to a scared toddler, because that’s really what your gremlin is). The more you practice that in less stressful moments, the easier it’ll be in the big moments when the gremlin goes into full-on panic.